The magical cure to attracting the right men in your life is by being your authentic self. The reason is quite simple: men can sense sincerity. When you’re being authentic, regardless what that means, you are showing who you are to the world. It may not attract the type of man you want, but it will attract the type of man who knows how you are and is okay with it. Why? Because you’re being authentic.
By being authentic, you skip the steps of having to slowly reveal, layer by layer, the truth of who you are. By the time you reveal your authentic self, you might realize that you’re not actually a genuine match with your partner. Being authentic doesn’t mean revealing everything about yourself right off the bat. We’re not talking about openness. By being authentic we mean responding genuinely to others and your environment. You don’t need to reveal why you the heat irritates you, but you can’t pretend you’re okay with it if you’re not. By shedding the masks we wear in order to conform or seem a certain way, we allow ourselves to be authentic.
A lot of women have reservations about being 100% expressive about who they really are, whether that means thinking twice about what they’ll wear or hiding the fact that they’re secretly a major stoner/wine lover/sex freak. This is the first thing that gets us into romantic situations we don’t want to be in. We appear to be one way so we attract friends and lovers who see potential or compatibility in the person we appear to be. But what if this isn’t really you? Wouldn’t that imply that the people in your life don’t even like you for you, but for someone they think you are? No wonder we feel incredibly lonely when we want to spill our hearts out but don’t have anyone who will understand.
We can’t control what others think of us. So that leaves us with two options:
- I am wearing one of my masks. I will be judged and criticized.
- I am being authentic. I will be judged and criticized.
With option one, you attract people who resonate with your mask. With option two, you attract people who resonate with who you are. Naturally there may be fears or doubts when it comes to being 100% authentic. We are our biggest critics, but at least if we’re aware of the difference, we can work towards positive change.